FINALLY the day arrived. common test are over. i screw up my chem paper. i wrote rubbish inside.physic paper is still alrights.
today is mrschan birthday we sang birthday song for her. we sang loudly and mostly people looked at us. hackks lahhs righhts??? afteer school went to heartland to eat. while eating yeeroong was sadd cos something happen to her. shall not say cos i scare she angry with me.thenn yeerong and lynn went backk home while we continue to walkk. good riights? i today good mo0d. hehhes after walking i took a bus 112 and go home.when i reach homme, i put down my bag and tell my mummy about my exams. maths paper was given back to us. so i told my mummy that i got 38/50. i was happy with my results but there were some careless here and there. when i told her that i have this marks i thought she will be happy. BUT she scolded me! why so low? you lowest in class is it?i was like WTF lahhs!! i was so angry. why things are not going to the positive side? i really regretted telling her. everytime my results come back she always will say this few words. its so hurtingg.
then i say" not eveything i do is always the lowest. why you always think that i am the lowest in the class ? ' she kept silence for a few seconds. then i told her that its really unfair about one of the chem questions. i told her that teacher asked us to read the notes but the question came out to be a weird question when i totally don't even understand! she asked me to read textbooks but some time i really think textbooks are good. Then another hurting thing again. she said:' why didn't you study from the textbook and somemore is 8 marks! ' i repiled:' teacher ask us to study from the notes then i study from the notes.' she said:' is you lazy d0n't want to learn from the textbooks!' i was like, WHAT FUCK SHITS DID I DO? i really damn piss off. i cried! i quickly went to the toilet to hide. you think, am i that bad? why must my own mother say me until like i am not her daughter.why must she say me until i'm so call 'that bad'. if i'm that bad i won't get this results for my maths. i put in loads of effort. keep doing and doing. YET she still say i didn't study.i'm so piss off with her. i can't take the pain anymore. If she is reading this post. i hope she really can change and not talking about my negative points already. i really hope. why must she say me until like HAIS! i already done my best. i really want to do better also but yet she said that and hurt me. why?? why?? why ?? why is god doing that to me? she keep saying not to compare with other people only compare with yourself YET she compare with my sister. OKAYS! i KNOW that my sister is really good in her studies. but she don't even need to say me until i'm just a rotten apple. seriously, i don't know what to do now. The only think now is i wish that all my subject can pass even chem and ss. i really do. i don't wish to hear all that things again.MY WISH~ hope that things will be better. i can't take it anymore. i really hope!!
oh god pls help me.
if you were me, can you take the pain?
help me take the pain. this pain is in my heart for so long =( helpp!!! calling in paiins
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